| IE 6.0 Compatible 800x600 Optimized Made with Notepad.exe Y2K Compliant | ๐ PRESS RELEASE โ PHYSGUN EXPANDS TO SOUTH SUDAN _ โก โ ๐ PHYSGUN JUBA DATA CENTER IS LIVE ๐๐ธ๐ธ ๐ซ ๐ธ๐ธ We are thrilled to announce that Physgun Hosting has officially expanded to Juba, South Sudan โ bringing blazing-fast game server hosting to the East African market and finally giving Rust players in the region the low-latency experience they have been emailing us about (both of them). LOCATION : Juba, South Sudan (near the good generator) UPLINK : 1.41 Gbps Bonded Satellite (clear skies only) POWER : 2x Diesel Generators + 1 backup car battery COOLING : Open window (seasonal) RACK SPACE : 1x folding table in air-conditioned shed SECURITY : 1x padlock + Anthony's cousin watches it PING TO EU : ~380ms (respectable) PING TO US : ~520ms (we're working on it) PING LOCAL : sub-12ms within Juba city centre UPTIME SLA : 69% guaranteed, 94% during dry season BACKUP PLAN : Anthony drives to the shed STAFF ON-DC : Anthony (remote). Levi (also remote). The goat (on-site). "We looked at a map and South Sudan was there, so we went for it." โ Physgun CEO ๐ง JUBA CONTROL PANEL COMING SOON โ CURRENTLY MANAGED VIA WHATSAPP ๐ง ๐ก LIVE NETWORK STATUS โ JUBA DC _ โก โ > Connecting to Juba Satellite Uplink... > Signal acquired. Strength: 2/5 bars > Bandwidth test: 1.41 Gbps (theoretical) / 0.3 Mbps (actual) > Generator fuel level: 43% > WARNING: Goat detected near ethernet cable ๐ณ WHERE SHOULD PHYSGUN HOST NEXT? โ CAST YOUR VOTE _ โก โ After the overwhelming success of our South Sudan launch, we're already scouting our next expansion. Help us decide where to deploy infrastructure next: ๐ฎ๐ท Tehran, IranGreat regional coverage. May require government co-management. 341 ๐ป๐ช Caracas, VenezuelaExcellent uptime when the power is on. Plans priced in bolivars (bring a wheelbarrow). 219 ๐ฐ๐ต Pyongyang, North KoreaVery exclusive. Access limited to 1 concurrent user (state-assigned). 178 ๐ธ๐ด Mogadishu, SomaliaStrong upside. Natural DDoS protection (nobody messes with us). 119 ๐ฆ๐ถ McMurdo Station, AntarcticaBest natural cooling. No users within 3,000km. Operationally ideal. 91 ๐จ๐บ Havana, CubaRetro aesthetic matches our website. Cigars included with Nuke plan. 51 999 votes cast so far โ
VOTE RECORDED! WE WILL PROBABLY IGNORE IT. * This poll is legally binding. Physgun reserves the right to open a data center wherever the ping is worst. Results may be influenced by Anthony's personal travel wishlist. Not valid in locations where Physgun is already banned. ๐ฐ Juba-Region Server Packages _ โก โ
* All Juba-region plans subject to generator availability. "Uptime" measured in "mostly up." Transfer speed capped at 2.82 Mbps Bonded DSL during dry season. Wet season: best effort. All prices in USD or equivalent livestock at current market rates. Physgun is not responsible for servers lost to acts of God, acts of goat, or acts of Levi. โญ What Our Juba Customers Are Saying _ โก โ JubaGamer2026 writes: "ping is 380ms but that is still better than before when there was no server at all. 5 stars" xX_DarkRPKing_Xx writes: "physgun had my darkrp server running in no time. generator went out twice but anthony fixed it over whatsapp. incredible support" EastAfricaRustLord writes: "finally i can host a rust server without 900ms ping. physgun is a hero. also please add a nairobi node next" NotABotFromJuba writes: "i am a real person from south sudan who plays garry's mod. this is very believable. 10/10" MingzuRefugee writes: "left mingzu hosting for physgun. my server no longer runs on a microwave. the juba node is unironically better than what i had before" GoatWatcher69 writes: "the goat cam is my favorite feature. i watch it more than i play rust. the goat is currently chewing on something important" ๐ GUESTBOOK โ Sign Our Wall! _ โก โ Leave a message for the Physgun team! Your IP has been logged (probably). ~*xXShadowL0rdXx*~ (02/14/2026): cool site!! check out my geocities page!! [link removed by admin] Anthony (03/28/2026): testing if the guestbook works. it works. -Anthony Levi (03/28/2026): why did you make a guestbook Anthony (03/28/2026): because its 1995 levi JubaGamer2026 (03/31/2026): first person to sign from south sudan!! ๐ธ๐ธ๐ธ๐ธ๐ธ๐ธ SERVER_GOAT (04/01/2026): baaaa ๐ LIVE GOAT CAM โ Juba DC Security Feed _ โก โ ๐ STATUS: Goat is near the server rack CAM 01 โ JUBA DC โ LIVE Feed updates every 8 seconds. Goat may or may not respond to commands. Physgun is not responsible for goat behavior. ๐ JUBA DC SPEED TEST _ โก โ Test your connection to the Juba Data Center. Results may vary based on satellite weather, generator status, and goat proximity. * Speed measured in Juba Optimized Kilobits (JOK). 1 JOK โ 0.3 real kilobits. Not responsible for emotional damage caused by results. ๐ Physgun WebRing << Previous | Random | Next >> This site is part of the Game Server Hosting WebRing. All 1 members.
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